Jealousy is a difficult emotion to handle and get under control. It is even more difficult to understand because it can stem from so many different issues. Men get jealous for more reasons than people realize and that deepens the confusions. Insecurity, Obsessive-compulsive Disorder, personality disorders, boundary issues, and even Freud’s homing instinct theory can all play a part in a man’s jealousy. Preventing jealousy is not easy but it starts with a thorough understanding of why you are jealous and where it comes from. Men who have always steered clear of jealous women are especially surprised when they find themselves exhibiting jealous behavior and feeling jealousy emotions. Freud’s homing instinct says that people will make new choices based on what they are used to even if it doesn’t work for them. For instance, some men will chose a cheating, loose type of woman because their parent’s relationship had infidelity. They feel more comfortable in this type of relationship even though it isn’t what they want. These types of men will also constantly be subconsciously on the lookout for signs of cheating. Men experiencing this phenomenon will experience bouts of jealousy with no real provocation. Other men simply noticing their women’s beauty will cause intense jealousy and insecurity.

No matter why the reason your feeling jealous, you know you don’t like it. There is hope. There are many small activities you can do to minimize jealous feelings and help to control the way you feel and how you behave because of it. First and foremost take the time to assess the situation. When feelings of jealousy crop up and you feel that rage building inside you, stop and step back. Take some time for yourself immediately and determine what exactly is making you feel jealous. A few simple text messages do not constitute an affair. Nor does an innocent conversation at the supermarket. Your girl cannot help it if men notice her shapely figure and ravishing beauty, after all, so did you. Asses the facts only. Do not allow fantasy or your imagination and assumptions to rule your thoughts. Be smart and rational to beat the green-eyes monster.
 

Talk it Out

If you’re still jealous by the said activity, talk it out. Explain to your girl just how your feeling and why. Let her know what you hashed out in your alone time and explain why it still bothers you. She may be able to shed some light on the subject that you didn’t take into consideration before. She might be able to explain why things took place that made you jealous in a way that doesn’t spark those feelings of insecurity. Often, just hearing her reassure you that you needn’t worry is all you need. Men rarely take the time to ask for comfort and reassurance but it is a much needed part of a healthy relationship for both men and women.
 

 

Switch it Up

If you go to her with your concerns and she doesn’t seem to understand, there is still hope. Ask her to turn the tables and imagine herself in the same situation. Many times when confronted with this perspective, other people can more clearly see your point. Use real-life examples to illustrate your point. If there is a particular female she is jealous of, for instance, use her as an example in your parallel story. She will most likely respond positively, knowing that you feel strongly and understanding how strong jealousy can feel. In the off chance that she doesn’t, you can take this tactic one step further by actually performing the actions for her that made you so jealous initially. If she was paying a bit more attention to a guy at the bar Saturday night than she usually does, give her a little taste of the same medicine and see how she reacts. Most women will see the correlation right away and not be pleased. It’s a hard tactic to take but sometimes necessary.
 
Intense jealousy is never good for a relationship. It undermines the trust and friendship until it unravels completely. Whether there are good reasons for it or not, jealousy must be dealt with in order to keep the relationship healthy and happy for both parties.
 

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